jul 17th, conversations with a two year old....

[Panda's on the left, above and Noah is getting a shoulder ride

p.s. the other pics are in the park rather than on a road]

day 889:

me: Limi, why is Panda in timeout?

Limi: because Panda was saying 'whaa, whaa, whaaa'

me: what did you say to Panda?

Limi: i said that is NOT 'acceppetil' Panda

later.....

me: Limi, why is caterpillar in timeout?

Limi: because i opened the door and caterpillar went out and was running around outside and not listening to me.

me: what did you say to caterpillar?

Limi: i said: 'caterpillar i gave you two warnings and you are NOT listening so you have to go into timeout', then i went and got caterpillar and said: 'i love you very much caterpillar'

yikes, you would think that Limi is forever in timeout by the amount of discipline that she dishes out to her toys.....

and yes, i have been known to say 'that is not acceptable behaviour Limi' :)


p.s. thanks for all the votes below.....i'm looking forward to those back tickles!

jun, 20th - conversations with a two year old....

day 863:

disciplining a two year old.....yikes, it requires a lot of commitment and follow through.

we introduced timeout quite awhile ago and it's worked for us.....i prefer timeout to the naughty step because well, we don't have any stairs for one (making it tricky to implement a step punishment) and secondly you can do timeout anywhere.....we've had to implement it in an airport, a shop, a friend's house.....my only rule is that if we give Limi her two warnings and that doesn't work then we have to follow through with the timeout. we always insist that Limi looks at us and apologises after timeout (i think it's so important to learn to say a sincere sorry, gracefully) and after that we always explain why she went into timeout, then give her a squeeze and tell her how much we love her.

it seems to be working for us at this stage. generally now, we only have to give two warnings without having to follow through with the timeout.....which is a lot less traumatic on all of us. except, over the past weekend....she seems to have sussed this punishment out:

[Limi had scattered some brochures from the holiday cottage all over the floor of the kitchen]

Me: Limi, please can you pick up these brochures and put them back in the basket

[repeat 3 times]

[Limi acting up and ignoring me]

Me: Limi, I'm giving you two warnings and then timeout

[Limi still acting up]

Me: That's one warning

[Still ignoring me]

Me: That's two warnings

[Limi reluctantly walks to the brochures and starts to pick one up, then she comes across to me and says....]

Limi: Mama, I want timeout.

my sister burst out laughing and i was trying, unsuccessfully, not to crack my stern facade. she had obviously worked out that timeout was far more fun than picking up all the brochures. time to implement plan B.

p.s. she picked up all the brochures.

jun, 9th - to last a lifetime....

day 485:

it's hard to remember back to those first 6 days when Limi had no name.....we were so very-very sure that she was going to be a boy.....no science.....no strong desire for a boy....not even the old-wives'-tale ring test......we were just sure....our families were sure....strangers were sure, hey, even the midwife in the labour ward was sure. we had a boy's name all lined up....first name + second name (well that one was under a bit of debate and i was hoping to sway the vote with my labour bravery) + surname.

girls' names on the other hand....well we had a few....but nothing figured out and it's not the type of thing that you want to announce and then say...actually, changed our mind, she's really called.....

so, we took our time. and it didn't feel strange to call our brand new baby 'bump' for 6 days as we'd been calling her that for 8 months already. looking back it seems strange but at the time, it felt good to get to know her, try out a few names....we even did the calling-out-to-another-room test.

and then on the sixth day, we named her. 

naming a person is really pretty daunting. they have to live with it forever.

but now, after 16 months, i can't believe that there was ever a time when Limi wasn't a Limi. 

we just have to remind ourselves every now and then that she's actually also a Lissom {see day 317}.....which will probably come in handy as soon as we have to attempt the stern-parenting-discipline voice.......which to be honest, is proving difficult so far when her current tantrums involve waggling her finger and saying no-no-no with a huge grin......

think we're toast on the discipline front.

dec, 7th - nanny diaries....

day 297:

one of the amazing things about living in London is the incredible diversity. this was very evident when we advertised for a nanny and had responses from people who have moved from all the far-flung corners of the globe.

with the new year, also comes a return to work for me. i've put it off for as long as possible but sadly, it's time to step back on the ladder. i wrote about the the conflict of returning to work vs. staying at home, on day 211. i still haven't reconciled it in my heart but my head says that's the best thing i can do for our family.

so, after making the BIG decision it was time to find her a amazing nanny. from the 60+ responses that we received from the ad (yikes, there are aLOT of available nannies out there) I interviewed eight people: a French manny, a Colombian and a Mexican nanny and then a couple of Southern Hemisphere girls. i modified this list of interview questions from BabyCenter, changing a few and adding a couple of my own like: "What makes you angry? Do you sing? Can you give me an example of where you've shown initiative in a previous childminding position."

the diversity definitely threw up some interesting answers. some of my best came from the Parisian manny who did warn me that his English wasn't brilliant.

Me: "What's your approach to discipline for a 10 month old?"

French Manny (FM): "Pah, she's a bebe."

Me: "What's your favourite activity to do with a 10 month old?"

FM: "Pah, she's a bebe."

Me: "If Limi has an accident in the park, what do you do?"

FM: "Call 111. Non, call 222."

Me: "999?"

FM: "Yes, 999."

Me: "Limi eats Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner."

FM: "Non, only 2 meals."

Me: "No, she eats 3."

FM: "Non, 2 meals."

Me: "Um, lunch is quite small."

(that might explain why Parisians are so slim and chic....they start from a young age....)

in a parallel world, the FM would have been incredible. Limi would have picked up French, a very relaxed attitude and the other mothers would have loved me. (although the restricted diet may have been a bit severe). but we agreed that the language barrier for FM and I was never going to work out.

after eight interviews and three trials we have found a wonderful nanny from Oz. i am feeling a little better about January now.

aug, 22nd - another word for no....

day 191:

i'm trying desperately not to overuse the word No! with Limi. it's probably a case of thinking about it all a bit too hard (you know....lots of time on my hands at the moment and a companion who is only mastering the vowel sounds.) but in these hard-thinking times, i've decided that it would be very easy to become a No household. 'No limi, don't touch!', 'No pulling!', 'No, you can't eat that.' I don't want her overriding memory to be the word 'No'.....In a very Obama-esque way, I want a 'Yes' house. 

now I just need to figure out how to say: 'No, stop yanking out my hair'...without sounding like something out of a New Age parenting guide: 'Limi, i would really appreciate it if you didn't pull at my hair in that fashion'.....hmm....that just doesn't cut it.